What Not To Say On A First Date

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Ah yes, the all-ancient act of wooing women. A skill wanted by many, but only truly mastered by a select few. First impressions are the hardest, since they last the longest. A good first date can set the foundation for your future relationship, which makes it all the more important to appear like you’re a normal, stable and sane human being. Don’t worry, you don’t actually have to be, just fool your date once and you’re golden.

Let’s take a look at some things that you’re probably better off not saying on a first date. Or you could play expert mode of the dating game and say all of them. It’d be like the Dark Souls of real life, I’m sure there’s people that’d like that.

Anything About Your Last Relationship

Look, everyone has a story. Everyone’s been through things. And it’s all fine and dandy that you’re trying to be open about it, but a first date is no place to discuss your previous relationship. There’ll be a time and a place for that, this is neither. It’ll make you seem unavailable.

Nothing At All

I’m sure your date’s apartment has plenty of walls that he or she could stare at. If you’re not going to talk, there’s no reason at all for the other person to be there. If you’re not going to invest energy in them, why should they invest energy in you?

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“Your Place or Mine?”

I mean, this seems like an obvious one, right? Not saying these kinds of things can’t happen on a first date, but you really shouldn’t incorporate it into your game plan. You don’t want to be sending off vibes this is a one time thing and you’re just rushing to your goal.

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Any Kind of Secret

This is a person that probably only knows your name, age and profession. If you’re going to have to resort to telling them you used to steal 10 bucks out of your mother’s purse on a weekly basis when you were 14, it’ll just make all the time you spent between then and now seem bland and uninteresting. Surely you’ve experienced enough regular stuff to fill up an entire evening, right? Leave the secrets for a bit later.

Anything About Marriage, Kids, …

You’re still in the phase where neither of you even knows if you want to acknowledge each other’s existence in a few more months. Anything that implies that the other person is tied to you for life after a first date is going to be super scary for them. No matter how good you’re kicking it off.

Politics 

Look, sooner or later you’re going to have to tackle this subject, but first dates aren’t meant to be this heavy. No true love story ever started with someone saying “on our first date he told me he voted for Trump and I knew he was a keeper.” I mean, some love stories probably do, but is that the kind of story you want yours to be?

Telling Lies

If you’re already going to have to start lying or adding some extra spice to your life’s stories on a first date, you’re not going to be interesting enough for this person and you’re creating a fake image that’s impossible to uphold over several decades. Don’t do it. If you’re boring, you’re boring. That’s fine, some people don’t want an adrenaline junkie for a partner.

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