Guys, we need to have a talk. I know that growing up is hard. But at some point we have to start being responsible. This means not eating Lucky Charms for dinner anymore just because you can. Or sitting in a shopping cart while your friends push you around your local Wal-Mart. Also, can you do me a favor and start hanging up your clothes instead of letting them pile up on your bedroom floor? It’s time to get classy. You can still play Madden or NBA 2K with your brahs, okay? That will be our compromise. But things are going to change from here on out. We’re going to snazz up your home so that the ladies know you’re a normal dude and not some kind of bozo who thinks they live in a hamster cage. Take a look at our list of 6 essential things to buy for your home.
1. A Tool Set
Listen, we’ve got nothing against duct tape. They’re fine for patching up water hoses in the backyard, for instance. But for the love of God, stop using them to fix up your furniture and appliances! Get yourself a hammer. A screwdriver. Some screws, bolts and nails. A wrench. Invariably, you will need to fix things around the house at some point, so you might as well buy the necessary tools and prepare to unleash the handyman from within!
2. A Few Lamps
Is your home ridiculously, glaringly bright? Or perhaps you live in creepy, dimly-lit apartment full of dark corners. Those make for idea places for hiding your secrets, but nobody is ever going to want to visit you, all right? The best solution is to buy several lamps of varying types and heights. We’re talking floor lamps, desk lamps. They can really work wonders by not only creating a cozy, illuminated vibe, but they also make your place look cleaner. Don’t be afraid to mix things up. Oh, and get some strobe lights!!! No, please don’t.