9 Christmas Gifts for People That Are Always Cold


We all have that one friend that can’t seem to heat himself up to save his life. The moment your thermostat drops half a degree, he or she will writhe out in agony, often eloquently claiming to be “fucking freezing my ass off”. Thankfully, these people can be helped around Christmas. I mean, they can be helped pretty much anytime of the year, but you can’t give someone a Christmas gift in March, now can you?
Since Christmas is all about sharing warmth and love, we could pretty much go the literal route and take a look at some gifts that can keep your ice cold friends warm. Or at least something that’ll make them shut up about being cold for a while. Small steps, people.

A Bottle of Good Scotch
What? It keeps you warm. It fits. Mileage may vary depending on the state of your alcoholism.

Hot Chocolate Milk Sticks
Can be combined with the scotch above to create a lovely cup of everlasting warmth. Like people, this comes in white, black and brown.

A Kitten/Puppy
Animals are basically blankets on legs. And they’re cute. You can get both if you’re unsure which animal the other person likes most. Be honest – it’s hard to choose.

Ear Hats
It’s exactly what you’d expect. They’re tiny hats you wear on your ears. Not sure what you were expecting.

A Jar of Hot Peppers
Eat one of these and you’ll be warm for hours. Eat the entire jar and you’ll be wishing you were cold.

A Trip To Sudan
Sudan is the hottest country in the world and tickets are dirt cheap. Win-win. This guy gives it a double thumbs up.

A Beard Warmer
It’s a thing. It’s also the perfect way to keep your face warm and appear smart and wise beyond your years.

A Humanoid Sleeping Bag
Thanks to Japan, you can now get a body-sized fleece sleeping bag! Hurrah! Keeps you warm and works as a perfect people-repellant.

USB Ladybug Slippers
That’s right – these are warm ánd technologically up to snuff. This’ll make all your colleagues jealous instantly, I promise.