Roman Fedortsov is a deep sea fisherman based in Murmansk, Russia. He’s been doing this for around 11 years and while his main job is to catch redfish, haddock, herring, halibut, and cod, from time to time a whole lot of weird sea life end up in the fishing nets. So naturally Roman snaps pictures of them and posts them on Instagram for the world to see. Because we know you don’t mind being psychologically tortured from time to time, we have selected 16 of the most handsome eligible bachelor fish and created profiles so that you can get to know a little bit more about them. Enjoy!
What’s his name? Kirk
What’s his deal? You went to middle school together, remember? He once passed you a note that said, “Do you like me?” along with boxes to check “yes” or “no.” You checked “no.” He certainly didn’t expect to randomly stumble across you after all these years. How awkward!
What’s his name? Frankie
What’s his deal? He’s a lounge singer, although not a particularly good one. He’s performed at some pretty dingy places. But who cares? The ladies cannot resist those sky blue eyes and his confident smile.
What’s his name? Gary
What’s his deal? Yes, his teeth make him look like a doofus, but he’s the kind of guy who buys a round of drinks for everybody at the bar. So cut Gary some slack.
What’s his name? Phillip
What’s his deal? He’s been meaning to make an appointment with the dentist to solve that problem, but never seems to find the time. That’s his excuse anyway, but we all know the truth is he is terrified of dentists.
Who are they? The Deepsea Choir
What’s their deal? For more than two decades these guys have been entertaining audiences with their hauntingly beautiful Gregorian chants.
What’s his name? Derek Crabberson
What’s his deal? If you’ve ever played World of Warcraft, then you know that he is very difficult to defeat. It takes patience, a sound strategy, and never moving out of your parents’ basement.
What’s his name? Xenbawskfdkfslkcx (But you can just call him Tim)
What’s his deal? He’s from the planet Rdkwifsdirjfwp, if it isn’t already obvious. Visited Earth a while back and decided to stay.
What’s his name? Roger
What’s his deal? He wakes up in the morning, helps himself to a pint of ice cream, and heads straight back to bed for the rest of the day.
What’s his name? Dennis
What’s his deal? He’s that super annoyingly persistent guy who keeps asking his co-workers when everybody is going to finally get together at Denny’s for some grub.
What’s his name? Brad
What’s his deal? He went out with some of his brahs. He had only planned to have a couple of beers, but since it was $1 Bottle Night it ended up being something like a couple dozen.
What’s his name? Max
What’s his deal? A case of the Mondays.
12. What’s his name? Robert
What’s his deal? He sort of looks like how the 5 year old version of me used to draw the Sun.
What’s his name? Alejandro
What’s his deal? That’s the facial expression he uses when he wants you to feel sorry for him. And it totally works every single time!
What’s his name? Gustaf
What’s his deal? Remember in Indiana Jones: Raiders of the Lost Ark when the angels of death unleash their fury on the bad guys and Arnold Toht’s face melts? It’s like that.
What’s his name? Jimmy
What’s his deal? The feeling you get when you enter Walt Disney World. Pure magic and wonder.
What’s his name? Benjamin
What’s his deal? He’s only 12. Smoking is bad, guys.